Have a Kit Kat

I made a silly mistake of signing on to take three modular ICU courses in my appraisal last year. A maximum of two months is given to the staff to complete each module. It took me a year to finish one, only because the most part of it - I completed three days ago. I should be so damn proud of myself.

I still have two more modules to tackle then I should be ready to sit down with my Boss to review whether I deserve to jump up to the next pay scale: I reckon a few pennies to catch inflation, pay the monthly mortgage and keep me off sleeping rough outside under the streetlamps. Not to mention the cosmic bloody tax. The fate of my bank book’s equilibrium depends on whether or not my Boss agrees that I meet the knowledge and skills required for my post. Such a pretty sad wanky life I had this week.

And I feel really bad for being unable to update this blog. Most of the time I spent trying to make sense of the tedious squiggles on a strip of paper caused by electrical good fortune or mishaps that occur inside a grumpy old turd’s heart. It is fascinating to find out how the heart could draw an ugly picture of you. Especially if you’re miserable, eat lots of pies, and your best friend is a fag called Benny (I mean Benson & Hedges). I don’t mean to put you off the smokes, guys. I still think smoking remains the one stiffened finger raised to authority. It is definitely cool. Although. I have to say, your heart’s rhythm may look like Count Dracula’s bad teeth if you’re not lucky. No worries, you can always give up red meat if you’re not ready to stomp your butt of choice. I heard that chocolates are good for your heart.

Phytochemicals known as flavanols, which are found in chocolate, fruits and vegetables, can boost the levels of nitric oxide in the blood of smokers and reverse some of their smoking-related impairment in blood vessel function according to a study by the American College of Cardiology two years ago. So I’m tucking in a huge chunky milky bar and lots of veg. Somebody slipped this rude magazine with loads of free goodies ( a kitkat, dvd and funky eyewear) in the groceries this morning. I’m not sure what to do with the 3D specs.